The Unfairness of Expectations: Riding the Rollercoaster of Being Taken for Granted
Ever felt like you're giving your all, only to have it completely ignored? Or like your kindness and efforts are just passing through the world like a breeze, never leaving a mark?
If that sounds familiar, you're not alone.
At some point, we’ve all been there: putting in time, energy, and heart, only to realize we’re getting the short end of the stick.
It’s like being a background character in your own life story. And you know what? It doesn’t have to be that way.
There’s something both deeply human and deeply unfair about being overlooked. It stings, right? When you’re pouring your energy into a project or a relationship and it seems like no one notices.
It feels like you’re stuck in a constant loop of giving with no acknowledgment, as if your value is measured only by what you can do for others, not who you are as a person.
But hold on a second. If we dig a little deeper into this whole dynamic, we might discover something interesting.
Being "taken for granted" isn’t just a result of other people being rude or unappreciative.
There’s something about human nature that gravitates toward comfort and convenience, and sometimes, people get too used to you showing up without needing anything in return.
It's easy to take someone for granted when they’ve consistently been there for you, without demanding much back.
But here's the thing—just because we’re comfortable doesn’t mean we’re being treated fairly.
In a philosophical sense, this highlights an interesting tension between existence and recognition.
In existential philosophy, there's the idea that for us to truly exist, we need to be seen, heard, and validated by others.
Without that recognition, we’re like a tree falling in an empty forest—making a sound, but with no one there to hear it.
So when we’re constantly overlooked, it feels as though our existence is being minimized. This isn’t just frustrating on a personal level; it’s existentially problematic.
If no one acknowledges us, do we really matter?
But there’s also a beauty in this. It’s an invitation to reframe how we see ourselves and our worth.
We don’t need others’ validation to know that we matter.
And this is where the real shift happens: empowerment comes when we stop waiting to be acknowledged and start acknowledging ourselves.
The Unfairness of Life: A Hard Truth
Then there’s the concept of being treated unfairly. Whether it's in a workplace, in a friendship, or a family dynamic, being treated unfairly is one of the most soul-sucking experiences.
It’s like working hard on a puzzle, only to realize that someone’s been taking pieces out of your puzzle all along.
You’ve been putting in the effort, but it’s never enough to win the prize, get the credit, or receive the appreciation you deserve.
And when you’ve been working hard, day in and day out, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking, "Why bother?"
The world feels stacked against you, and it seems like all your efforts are in vain.
But life, in its brutal honesty, isn’t always fair. Bad things happen to good people, and good things sometimes don’t come to those who wait.
It’s the hard truth that many philosophers like Schopenhauer and Camus have pointed out: life doesn’t hand out equal rewards to everyone, and suffering is often an inevitable part of the human experience.
But, here’s the kicker. Just because life isn’t fair doesn’t mean you have to accept the unfairness. You are allowed to demand fairness.
You are allowed to call out the systems that marginalize you and to say, "I’m done being the person who gets left behind.
So, how do we deal with this?
We start by owning our worth and taking back our power. We stop waiting for others to acknowledge us and start demanding the respect we deserve.
No, we don’t need to be a superhero to do this. We simply need to set clear boundaries, have honest conversations, and begin to recognize the inherent value in ourselves, even when others might not.
The Importance of Boundaries and Communication
Boundaries are the magic word here.
In every relationship—whether personal or professional—there needs to be an understanding of what’s okay and what’s not.
Setting boundaries isn’t about being selfish; it’s about protecting yourself from getting drained by others who fail to recognize your worth.
It’s saying, "I’ve got limits, and I’m not afraid to let you know them."
Once you establish those boundaries, it’s time to start communicating.
Too often, we expect others to read our minds.
We think, "If they truly cared, they’d notice how much I’m doing," but the reality is, people don’t always notice.
They’re caught up in their own lives, and sometimes they simply don’t see the effort we’re putting in.
This isn’t an excuse to be treated unfairly—it’s just a reality check that we need to be vocal about our needs and feelings.
Communication is the bridge between feeling taken for granted and feeling seen. If something isn’t working for you—if you’re feeling overlooked or unfairly treated—say it.
And when you say it, say it with the confidence that you deserve to be heard.
At the end of the day, you are the one who gets to define your value.
If you’re constantly being taken for granted or treated unfairly, it’s not a reflection of your worth—it’s a reflection of how others are choosing to treat you.
And here’s the good news: you can change that.
You can raise your standards, walk away from toxic dynamics, and demand the respect you’ve been missing. Your value isn’t up for debate.
You are not a doormat.
You are not a second-class citizen.
You are an amazing, unique, and invaluable human being who deserves all the good things life has to offer.
Life might not always be fair, and people might not always appreciate you as much as they should.
But that doesn’t mean you have to settle for less.
You can take control, stand tall, and ride off into the sunset with your head held high.
"We cannot control how others see us, but we can control how we see ourselves. And when we choose to see our worth, no one can take that away."-Jassila
Comments
Post a Comment